One Guy Told Her She Was Smart

That one lie has burdened us all ever since.

I beseech the God Lord Almighty on behalf of all His Children traversing this vale of tears! Spare us the fallout from a few words spoken decades ago. You’re no doubt familiar with the Butterfly Effect - the idea that through a chain of events, the flapping of a butterfly’s wings in Beijing can ultimately cause a tragic rockslide in Denver.

Something similar happened in America. Sometime in the 1970s, some guy wanted to fondle a fresh young actress’s beautiful breasts, maybe after seeing her in Rocky Horror. To get in her knickers, and not because he believed this to be true, he told her she was really smart. It worked.

He got laid, left before dawn, is lost to history, but we are stuck with the fallout of his actions.

Ever since that smooth talker told her that lie, Susan Sarandon will just not shut up. Since people largely do not change, we can safely assume she was as stupid back when she was hot as she is now. He got away with inflicting Long Sarandon on us all and he will face no consequences for his considerable evil.

When smelly losers were keeping the neighborhood kids awake and making it impossible to walk around our own streets by “Occupying” Zuccotti Park in downtown Manhattan, there was Susan with a megaphone - conveniently for her in the middle of the day - encouraging these idiots to make a nuisance of themselves. The idiots themselves said they didn’t know why they were there or what they wanted from their “protest” but that did not stop formerly-cute-still-misguided Susan from egging them on all the same. She told them to keep banging drums all night long, while she went back to whatever part of Manhattan she is the scourge of.

Here is Susan more recently, spouting Jew Hatred in a $6,000 faux fur jacket in autumnal leaf pattern which manages to make her look homeless while she blathers:

Pace the Former Hotness: “War crimes are being delivered every day, according to the UN and other humanitarian groups.”

If anyone can find a more absurd sentence, delivered with less irony, I will give you a wonderful prize.

Israel is responding to the insane murder of 1,400 innocent civilians and hostage taking of 200+ more. Hamas is hiding them along with rockets behind schools, hospital and mosques, thereby putting civilians in harm’s way and somehow in the drug- and age-addled mind of Former Hotness Susan Sarandon, that string of cowardly, evil actions is not to be blamed on Hamas! Why, no! Israel in her tiny bubble brain is the one “delivering war crimes,” as if war crimes were Domino’s pizza.

War crimes delivered in 30 minutes or your next hail of rockets is free!

Not only is it ridiculous, it’s a modified form, quasi-palindromic haiku! 5-7-5-5-7

War crimes are being
delivered every day
according to the
U.N. and other
humanitarian groups. 

I especially love the insane misconception that the corrupt cesspool of mainly evil dictators that is the “United Nations” is a “humanitarian group.” Phenomenal but unsurprising and completely typical of the American Left. Can anyone tell me why ageing Lefties love a group of demonstrably nasty people who spend 90% of their time condemning the only democracy in the Middle East?

I take back my earlier comment of futility in the face of rank injustice. We need to find that smooth talker from 1972 who convinced this ditz he was interested in what passed for her mind rather than her admittedly stunning body circa the 1970s.

That guy and his fine string of lies has a lot to answer for.

Listening to her makes me feel like I’m having war crimes delivered to me.

After the Israelis finish off Hamas, maybe Mossad can go looking for this guy.